HOW TO FORGIVE OTHERS
Forgiving others isn't easy for many but with Joff in your corner, you have light on your side & will win this battle!
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All we truly know is what's going on within us, others reflect their inner feelings/beliefs/reality and understanding that if someone attacks you for something that seems pointless & silly, it reflects that they may well be in a state of pain within themselves... think about it... would someone positive & happy attack you for nothing? With this understanding, it's a lot easier to not hold grudges as we must all remember, we are all living different lives with different circumstances & situations. Ultimately, we can do what we want so to distance yourself from someone if that feels right, do it but forgiving them is important for yourself to move past the event that occurred.
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Also, if someone does something that is really nasty & painful towards you... in the moment it may not feel great but with awareness & time, you will have evolved/grown hugely from that moment. You will have learnt more about that person and you will have learnt how to deal with a similar situation in the future much, much better... so think about how much you have grown from that act & do your best (this comes with practice & time) to reflect gratitude/acceptance towards that person as you have massively grown & evolved. Again, this doesn't mean you have to hang around that person as letting go is apart of this beautiful experience.
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PRACTICE: The next time someone attacks you or has a go at you...BEING AWARE IN THE MOMENT of what's taking place and be aware of the condition of the person as they may well be in a negative frame of mind. Understanding this, assists in forgiving the other person significantly.
HOW TO FORGIVE YOURSELF
Firstly, understand that whatever that is bothering you within, wasn't intended. Also understand that you had an evolutional experience, that will be hugely valuable in the future/next time something similar comes along. BUT one thing that's very important here is that you LEARN THE LESSON.
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Release & Let Go of whatever you want to let go of with the experience & whatever emotion that is within you, I suggest to feel it all the way through which may take 5 mins with the though itself or slightly longer. After you've got that out of your system, pick yourself up & be aware that this lesson had to happen for your evolution & will benefit you moving forward!
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Also awareness that you didn't know any better is another gem here to not be hard on yourself so you can let it go & leave the past where it belongs, in the past. Leaving it in the past after learning from it is important as it is behind you and you've levelled up & learnt lessons/understandings from it that will benefit you moving forward. You have evolved!
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A massive past of forgiving yourself, is showing gratitude for the evolutional experiences you have encountered & basically making friends with whatever encounter you had to let go of. And rewiring the situation to be an evolutional experience that allowed whatever you learnt from the experience be it strength, calmness, relax more, etc. Whatever you have evolved is what came from the experience to looking at the situation with gratitude & acceptance is a great way to make friends with it.
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Again like anything, practice makes perfect so if you don't get it straight away, that's perfectly ok, just by being aware of this will help for the next time & then the time after that... then all of a sudden you start to understand that you're learning from previous experiences. So be kind to yourself, understand whatever happened, happened for a reason & that you have learnt from it... then move forward. Evolution baby!!!
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PRACTICE: BEING AWARE IN THE MOMENT if you being super hard on yourself for something you have done, understand you will learn from it, you will grow from it, it was meant to happen and then focus on moving forward & letting it go. This will lead to Forgiving Yourself.